“Home” again

A week ago yesterday my cousin’s daughter called me to let me know that her mom had passed away, at age 61. This was devastating news, of course, but even more so because we had just reacquainted about 9 years ago when she reached out to let me know that her daughter had moved to NYC. She had seen on Facebook that we were moving to NYC and wanted us to get in touch.

Shortly after we moved to New York, her daughter graduated from college and we all spent a great time celebrating her daughter’s graduation and being together. We spent a few more times enjoying the city, and then as things happen, we stopped spending as much time together, but we were often in touch with her daughter who had just come to see us in Colorado over Memorial Day weekend. At that time her daughter let us know that her mom was going through some struggles. I should have reached out then, but, well, life gets in the way and I didn’t. I was dealing with my own grief at my mother’s death and didn’t reach out, thinking that certainly my cousin had a strong support group in the town where she was raised. Whether she did or didn’t, didn’t matter in the end, but an extra voice saying hello might have helped, or it might not have.

Once we knew when the memorial would be held, we quickly made plans to attend and booked our flights back to St. Louis where I was born and where I had left when I was 4 years old, only going back to attend a family friend’s wedding years ago when I was in college.

I wasn’t sure what to expect of my “home” town (in quotes because can you really call a place a home town when you left early in life and never went back?) but we had a nice time, as nice as can be expected under the circumstances, quietly exploring the areas around where I had lived and visiting with friends and family, trying to make sense of a senseless tragedy.

Near our hotel in the Central West End neighborhood located near Forest Park, was the Cathedral Basilica of Saint Louis. This is an absolutely stunning church and I highly recommend a visit.

Since we were near Forest Park, we took advantage of a free Sunday afternoon to stroll the park and reflect on life. We also made a quick stop in the St. Louis Museum of Art. I find museums so calming and a light bite of lunch at the museum restaurant was just the pick us up we needed.

After a moving ceremony Sunday evening, we got a good rest and took advantage of a few hours before our flight to wrap up our St. Louis visit with a tour of the Gateway Arch and some St. Louis BBQ at Salt and Smoke. We also chose to sample a St. Louis favorite, toasted ravioli. One bit of warning if you decide to visit the Arch. I bought our tickets online and as there were some glitches when ordering I took a screen shot of the QR code for our entry. I’m glad I did because I didn’t get get the confirmation email until 10 minutes after the tour started.

Finally, if you are so inclined (we weren’t) you can check out the World Chess Hall of Fame. It’s located in that same neighborhood of Central West End.

Although I would have chosen to return to St. Louis under different circumstances, I’m thankful I had the chance to reconnect with friends and family and get a glimpse into what things could have been like had we never left.